


Why you?

by inoue6



Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Angst, Bad Ending, Character Death, Dark, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Sad Ending, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-20
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-07-16 07:33:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7258330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inoue6/pseuds/inoue6
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some things are left unsaid. Erik contemplates his feelings over Charles's grave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why you?

**Author's Note:**

> I cried four times during writing this fic xD If you are a emotional masochist like myself then you probably would like that story :)

_The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and for deeds left undone._

 

 _'Why you?'_ Erik said.

 _'Why it had to be you, not me?'_ He sat on a patch of earth, his eyes drilling holes into the stone tablet in front of him. The slowly raised his hand and traced the letters carved in stone.

_Charles Francis Xavier_

_Born July 13 1940_

_Died September 8 1968_

_The world is far lesser place without you_

Erik feels one lonely tear roll down his cheek, then a second and before he realizes he is sobbing uncontrollably. There is no Magneto without Professor X. Now, he is just a broken shell of Erik Lensherr. He loved Charles, uncontrollably and unconditionally. Sure, they had their differences that separated them in the past but since he broke out of the prison, he tried to find his friend so he could explain everything, apologize and maybe, just maybe have some future together.

After arriving at the mansion, he saw Hank packing furniture and sending it somewhere. When he saw Erik the expression on his face changed suddenly. A mix of pain, sorrow and anger send shivers down his spine. However he never expected what came after. Hank jumped at him, tackling him and pinning him down. He started to punch the older man, shouting and crying.

 _'You abandoned him! You abandoned him and now he's dead! It's all your fault!'_ He couldn't contain the warm flow of tears, running down his cheeks and onto Erik's face.

 _'Wh...what are you talking about...?'_ Erik was feeling like the whole world suddenly collapsed on him.

 _'Charles is dead.'_ Hank replied, standing up.

He made no effort to help the older man. When Erik heard those words he felt empty, like someone took the better part of him and buried it with the telepath. He always thought of himself as heartless but in that moment he felt his heart break in half.

 _'No...how...when?'_ He uttered, because forming any more grammatical sentences was too hard for him at that moment.

Charles, oh please, Charles, God no. He couldn't be dead. That's not how it was supposed to end. Telepath was supposed to blindly believe in his ideals and instill them on the young mutants in his school for years to come. It can't be. The metal vans started to vibrate and blew into the air. When Hank didn't reply Erik just became angrier.

 _'How?!'_ He shouted and grabbed his collar.

 _'A mutant. He went to recruit and something went wrong. He was thrown into the water and without his legs...'_ Younger man's voice broke.

 _'We buried him a month ago. You should have been with him. You should have never left!'_ The sadness in Hank's voice again gave up for anger.

Erik was so shocked that he could barely stand. His thoughts were swirling around the Charles he loved, his smile he grew so fond of, the warm feeling of telepath's mind in his own. All those things, lost forever. The words unsaid, deeds undone. So many things Erik hadn't had a chance to tell, to express will now linger with him until the end. Immense sorrow made him fall to his knees, looking at his hands. He felt like he killed Charles himself.

The blame was almost unbearable. Erik already blamed himself for the leaving injured Charles on that beach in Cuba but this? This was a whole new level of self-hatred. He just stood up and left.

That brought us to this moment. Hearing is one thing but seeing it with his own eyes is the other. The stone under his fingers was so cold that Erik could swear it vibrated under his palms. _'_

 _I...Charles...'_ There were no words to express his apology. Where would he even begin?

Instead, he buried his face in his hands and cried. He cried so long his whole body begun to stiffen.

 _'There is one thing I always intended to tell you. I love you, Charles. Since the first day you pulled me out of that water. You were shining so brightly that I was blinded by your light. But I miss your warmth. I...miss you, my friend. I hope, we can see each other in another lifetime.'_ He made a long pause to steady his breath and with a trembling hand he reached to his pocket.

 _'Wait for me Charles, I'm coming.'_ He said and pressed the trigger.

 

One shot and the pain was over.

 

**Author's Note:**

> According to the X-Men Wikipedia Charles was actually born on July 13 1940. I don't know if you could become a professor at that young age as him but just don't focus on that too much :)


End file.
